Sunday, October 23, 2011

Moving on...

So, I think I came to the realization that it is time to just move on. No, I am not making any big changes in my life. It is more that I need to move on from the things I miss. This weekend was Missouri Western's Homecoming. We took Collin to the parade. Every time we go, I start to really miss my days in college. I miss the freedom of not having many responsibilities. I miss being able to go do what I want when I want. I miss hanging out with all of those people I used to see almost every day when I was in college. I miss my sorority and the things we did together. I do really miss those things.

However, today I came to the realization that I am really happy with where I am right now, and that even though I miss college life, I don't think that even if I could go back to it all, I would truly be happy with it. Those times were great, but you can't beat seeing the excitement of your child entering Worlds of Fun for the first time. Or the experience of taking them on a big ride for the first time and the excitement and fear they have. The times I have with my family mean more to me than anything else.

Plus, I realized that everyone is just growing up and changing. We went out on Saturday and saw a few of Josh's fraternity brothers. It was great seeing them, and I wish we could more often, but I just realized it will never be the same as it was in college. It just won't. 

Something else that is really pushing me to move on is my sorority, one of the things I miss about college life. I have tried so hard to plan events for ladies to reunite, but girls are still pissed about things that happened years ago. Really? Stuff that happened years ago? Or stuff that was out of my control or the control of most of my sorority sisters? Why should I spend my time trying to reunite people who can't get over stuff that doesn't even matter anymore? I don't think I should. I think I should just live my life in the now and just worry about getting together with those girls who I really want to see and hang out with. I shouldn't have to do more work just to get people together who I really don't know. So, I am not going to do it anymore. If someone else wants to take it on, so be it, but it won't be me.

Sunday, September 18, 2011

Yet Another Epic Weekend

So, for the last three to four weeks, I have had something wrong with me. It began with an infection in my mouth due to my wisdom teeth forcing their way in, which led to issues because of the antibiotics I was on. This then led to body aches, chest congestion, and a cough that wouldn't go away for anything. I am still coughing every once in awhile, but it isn't anywhere near what it was. The sad thing of all of this, besides the fact that it is never fun to be sick, was that I was super sick on my 30th birthday. Fortunately enough for me, I have an amazing husband and son who helped me have the best birthday I could while being sick. Josh made a delicious dinner with steaks, baked potato, and grilled zucchini and squash. Then, we got a few single slices of cake from Wal-mart, and they put birthday candles in one and sang to me. We also let Collin pick out some party favors, and so we did all of this in our party hats.

(This is Collin wearing the party hat. This is not a good pic of him. I took this more to show the bite he received from a fellow classmate on his head; not so much to show our celebration, but this is the only pic I had of the party hats.)

Even though my birthday was on the 8th, we decided not to celebrate it with friends and stuff until the 17th because there was a wedding people were going to. Plus, it actually worked out better because I was too sick to really go out and have fun. However, Josh took me out to eat. We went to Bad Art Bistro, which I absolutely love, and I had the Salmon Porcupine and he had the Lamb Shank. Mine was good, but his was much better. It tasted like roast! Yum! Anyway, Collin was staying the night with Ma and Papa, so we decided to order dessert to take home. We then came home, shared the dessert, and watched a movie. I just wanted to relax, and so that's what we did.

This weekend, however, was epic, and it is a good thing I was starting to feel a little better. On Friday we went and saw the Foo Fighters. It was awesome! I don't know what was better: the fact that they rocked it for three hours or the fact that they came outside before the concert to play a song for the Westboro Baptist Church idiots and we saw it!!!

(This is outside of our car--the Foo Fighters performing on the back of a tow truck. That is Josh's big thumb blocking some of the view. :-))

(Rock God Dave Grohl! He came out onto this platform to play for all of us in the back. It was pretty awesome.)

After the concert, we all went to Willie's for some late night food, and then Josh and I headed back to our hotel. That was Night #1 and it was a blast!

On Saturday we had to make it back for Devon's baby shower. After the shower, Alysa, Anna, my mom and I stopped by Kohl's. It was supposed to be a quick trip, but we all got too into looking at stuff. I found a couple of cute shirts and some cute shoes for only $11! Plus, I had a great time with my mom and sis.

Last night was my 30th Birthday Party that Josh set up for me with help from my mom and Crystal. Crystal made a cake for it, and it was so cool. It was pretty and I didn't want to cut it.

(My awesome cake!)

Besides the awesome cake, the people who came out were amazing as well! There were people who I hadn't seen for awhile, and it was great to hang out with them again. Night #2 was a blast as well!

Tonight we had our last volleyball game of the season. I am a tad sad because I love playing volleyball, but I am ready to have some actual free time on the weekends.

Thursday, July 7, 2011

Collin's Mario Birthday Party!

When I get a project going, I am obsessed with it. So, this last week I was obsessed with getting everything ready for Collin's 4th Birthday Party. Originally we had discussed doing a party at the bowling alley, but the cost was just too much for our pocketbook. Instead, we had a Super Mario party.

This is one view of the decorations. I used streamers of the four main Mario colors: red, blue, yellow, and green. I twisted them down the wall for a cooler effect.

I really wanted to have helium balloon bouquets, which I did, of the four colors. There were two main bouquets. These decorated glasses were what held them down. Both were filled with candies that were blue, red, yellow, and green.

I wanted to incorporate Mario stuff even more, so we just printed off a bunch of pictures of the characters, pasted them to a piece of construction paper, and then attached them to streamer which hung down the wall. It was really easy and it was a good way to decorate the wall.

When I asked him what he wanted to have at this birthday party, the first thing he said was a piñata. So, I made one out of newspaper, water, and flour that looked like the ghost from Mario. He absolutely loved it! It had tons of candy in it, too. We definitely didn't need that much candy because we didn't have many kids at his party, but for someone who would have a lot of kids to accommodate, this was a great piñata for it.

Overall, his birthday turned out really well, but I am happy for it to be over. It was an exhausting week and weekend getting ready for his party and then the 4th of July on Monday.

Monday, May 16, 2011

My Most Recent Obsession

Lately I have been obsessing about my body. I hate my stomach. I have hated it since I had Collin. There have been good moments where it wasn't that bad, but lately I have gained more weight and most of it has gone to my stomach, some of it to my butt. I really need to get rid of it. I don't expect to ever be as tiny as I was in high school, but I do want to be at a point where I feel good about myself, and right now, I don't.

Starting off the school year, I was feeling pretty good. I felt much better about my body during this last canoe trip than I did the year before. However, I think a combination of stress and sitting more on my ass have much to do with the weight gain. I actually blame my masters classes...well, actually, this entire year is to blame. This has been one of the most stressful years I have had as a teacher. I taught all brand new classes, dealt with the stress from teaching yearbook for the very first time, and my masters classes added a huge load of stress. Stress, stress, and more stress equals Aimee's big fat butt and stomach. Yuck!

So, I am starting a plan. My plan is called the "No Excuses" plan. I am going to really attempt to eat better (at least a lot less), snack on healthier foods, and WORK OUT! I have to get off my butt and move. Volleyball is helping, but I don't play enough for it to really help.

Hopefully by the next time I make a post, I will be feeling better about myself.

Monday, April 18, 2011

I'm Obsessed

That's right. I am obsessed. I am obsessed with BOOKS!

I have always had an obsessive behavior. Thus, the reason my blog is titled "Passions and Obsessions." I obsess about everything. Seriously...everything! If I get hooked onto something, I am obsessed with that something. And right now that "something" is books! I am obsessed with adding books to my classroom. I just bought another one tonight, and I am always looking for others to add. I look at any store I go to that has books, and I look online for used books. I am also obsessed with figuring out what books I want to get to teach next year and with getting new books for me to read (even though I really haven't had time this whole school year to read for pleasure). Today I got a box of books in, and I was so excited.

Even though I am obsessed with books, I haven't really had much time to read these books. That is until last night. Last night I actually had a little bit of time after I got my assignments done for my masters classes, so I picked up a book and started reading it. Oh how I missed reading! It made me so happy. Having a book here at home to read whenever I have a free minute has made me a much happier individual.

Just so you know, I started reading Me Talk Pretty One Day by David Sedaris.  

So far it is pretty good, and I have only read the first two chapters. I can't wait to really get into it.

I am excited for the summer to start so that I can read even more books. I already have a list planned. Slaughterhouse-FiveThe Girl With the Dragon Tattoo, and Will Grayson Will Grayson are just a few on my list. If only school would end, so I could read!!!!

Sunday, April 17, 2011

One of My Writings...Enjoy!

I hate sharing my writing because I don't feel confident about it, but my sister asked me to share them since I am always complaining about them. So, here is one of them. This is a creative non-fiction piece about my great-grandfather who came to Missouri on the Orphan Train. The Orphan Train was a part of America's history that most people have sadly never heard about. 

The Ride
            One day, in the year 1923, an 11-year-old boy was asked, “Would you like to take a ride on a train?” Seeking some adventure, the boy along with two of his brothers, boarded the train and went along for the ride. What the boys didn’t know was that they wouldn’t be returning home. During the train ride, the boys were cleaned up and dressed in new clothes. A little slip of paper was pinned to their clothing. This slip of paper listed their name, age, height, and weight.
In 1853, the Orphan Train Movement began in New York to help place orphaned and neglected children in homes. The train carried hundreds of thousands of children, ranging from newborn to late teens, from New York and helped to relocate them in homes across the Midwest. The trains used to transport these children were not in the greatest condition. They were just a little nicer than the typical cattle car.1
Long nights of hearing the lonely train going down the tracks went by and the boys were very far away from home. The train made numerous stops and the children were lined up in train stations, churches, and other community centers as unknown adults came in, evaluated them, and read the slips of paper about them.
Children were often placed on “stage-like” areas. Those who were interested in the children  would learn about these children not only by the little slips of paper attached to their clothing, but also by conducting short interviews with the children who were old enough to speak. These people would also often feel the children’s muscles and examine their teeth as well during the evaluation process. Some children would even sing, dance, or exhibit other talents in hopes of impressing those who had come out to see them.2
Many of the young children were quickly taken by these unknown people, but the 11-year-old boy was often left to complete his journey on the train. It wasn’t until the train reached Maryville, Missouri, that the boy was separated from his brothers and placed in a new home. That 11-year-old boy was my great-grandfather.
Most siblings were separated as a result of the Orphan Train process because families who were interested in adopting were only allowed to choose one child.3
My great-grandfather and a number of his siblings were placed on the Orphan Train because their parents couldn’t properly take care of them. Money was scarce and the parents were constantly working, leaving the children at home to take care of themselves. The family was constantly moving from place to place in seek of shelter, and the family’s food came from whatever they could hunt or find. Oftentimes their meals consisted of cowslips, wild asparagus, turtles, frogs, and porcupines. Every once in a while the bread deliveryman would come by and give them any leftovers he had from his route that day.
During the 1850s, New York was filled with families who had immigrated to the United States seeking a better life. Unfortunately, the amount of people immigrating to New York was overwhelming. Many had great difficulty finding homes for their families, and jobs were scarce. As a result of this, many children were left to fend for themselves on the streets of New York.
The idea of the Orphan Train came from a young minister named Charles Brace. Brace helped establish the Children’s Aid Society in 1853. This society helped set up everything necessary to run the Orphan Train. Brace believed these orphaned and neglected children deserved better lives, and he thought the Orphan Train was the perfect solution. He knew that life in the Midwest was picking up and that these Midwestern families would need workers to help with expanding their farms and homes.4
In Maryville, my great-grandfather was first placed in a temporary home until a permanent home was found. He lived with this family for two months. After those two months, my great-grandfather was placed in a permanent home ten miles northeast of Maryville. This home belonged to farmers who had no children of their own. Their primary reason for taking in my great-grandfather was to have another set of hands on their farm, not because they desired a son.
During the time of the Orphan Train, many families adopted these children because they couldn’t have any of their own, and this was a way they could.  Many others, however, were seeking workers for their farms, and these children were chosen more as farmhands than as sons and daughters.5
My great-grandfather was lucky enough to attend a few years of school with one of his brothers who was also on the train and taken in by a family in Maryville. He was only able to attend school with his brother until the eighth grade. This was a result of a decision my great-grandfather had to make because of the options he was given by his adoptive parents. My great-grandfather was presented with the options of completing high school or quitting it to work on the family farm. If he chose to complete high school, he would be completely on his own when he graduated. If he chose to quit school to work on the farm, he would always have a place to stay. My great-grandfather chose the latter even though he had just passed his eighth grade exams. He knew that even though he was more of a farmhand than a son to his new parents, this was going to be the better, more stable route for him later on in life.
Making the decision to quit school and continue on the farm ended up working out well for my great-grandfather. This was not only his home as a child, but also as an adult. He raised his own family on this farm and resided there until he passed away.
When I was a young child I remember trips to the farm. These trips usually only occurred during Thanksgiving and Christmas. When they did happen, all of the family was there: grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins. You name them, they were there. The day would start off with four dinner tables lined up in a row down the long, narrow living room. Every spot was taken and the table was filled with food, plates, and silverware. We all said grace and then loaded up our plates. My great-grandfather always sat at the head of the long row of tables, usually far away from me and the rest of the children. It was obvious he was the patriarch of this family and proud of it. Later, he would go out to the garage and make home-made ice cream. All of us children would go and watch in amazement as he cranked the machine. The entire time he cranked it, he would look at us and smile. Sometimes he would grab a spoon and let us sneak a taste before he shared it with the entire family. “Who wants a taste?” he would ask us.
A number of children who were sent on the Orphan Train struggled with their new lives and found difficulty in leading normal lives. Many others, however, were able to lead very normal lives by raising a family and living the typical “American” dream. Some even became very well-known and successful. Andrew Burke, one of North Dakota’s past governors, and John Brady, a past governor of Alaska, were riders on the Orphan Train.6
Growing up, my family didn’t have a lot of money. Most of our summer vacations consisted of a camping trip at a lake that was only 45 minutes away from home. I, however, was able to travel around the United States with my grandparents every once in awhile. My grandfather threw horseshoes, and so he participated in tournaments all over the states. I was able to see Stone Mountain Park, Georgia; the Gulf of Mexico in Biloxi, Mississippi; Devil’s Tower National Monument in Wyoming; and Mount Rushmore: all sights I wouldn’t have gotten to witness without my grandparents. These trips didn’t just include my grandparents and me, however. My great-grandparents also went. All five of us loaded up into my grandparents’ van and headed across the country. I don’t know who enjoyed these trips more: me because of the sights I got to see, my grandfather because he got to do something he loved, or my great-grandfather because he got to spend time with his son and share these experiences with him.
I will always remember how happy my great-grandfather was during these vacations. I will also always remember the difficulty he had on our trip to Biloxi. The campground we were staying in was very close to some train tracks and every night a train would pass through there. It took all of my great-grandfather’s strength to deal with the sound that tormented him so. It was difficult for me to see this strong man fight back tears when he heard the train pass through every night.
Records about the Orphan Train are difficult to find. This is because many who were taken from their homes and placed on the Orphan Train either don’t remember much about the experience or didn’t discuss their lives before the train with their family. Others chose not to share their experience with those close to them because it was something they didn’t want to remember.7
            Before my great-grandfather passed away, he was able to reconnect with a few of his siblings. A sister of his who had remained in New York had moved to Missouri with her son and actually came to a few family gatherings. His brother, whom he had attended school with for a few years in Maryville, was found to be living in Arkansas. My great-grandfather made a trip down there to see him and meet his family. He tried to reconnect with more of his siblings, but an illness took over him and he passed away.
            My grandfather has since then continued the search for information on my great-grandfather’s family. He has continued this work of my great-grandfather’s not only because it is a part of our country’s history and our family’s history, but also because he knew this was something that was dear to his father. He knew that this was a way he could thank his father, my great-grandfather, for all that he provided for him. My great-grandfather might not have had the best childhood, but he made sure that his children did.

1-3 "Orphan Train." Wikipedia, the Free Encyclopedia. 4 Apr. 2011. Web. 14 Apr. 2011. .
4 "American Experience . The Orphan Trains | PBS." PBS: Public Broadcasting Service. Web. 14 Apr. 2011. .
5 "The Orphan Trains | The Children's Aid Society." The Children's Aid Society | New York Charity for Children. Web. 14 Apr. 2011. .
6 "Orphan Trains of the USA." Famous Adoptees, Adopted People, Celebrities, Actors, Page 1 -. Web. 15 Apr. 2011. .
7 "Illinois State Genealogical Society - Orphan Trains." Home Page. Web. 15 Apr. 2011. .

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

And I wonder...

Death is such an unusual thing. For some people, it arrives knowingly. A sickness has overcome them and they know that some day their body is just going to give out. For others, it comes out of nowhere. It just occurs on a day that you perceive to be normal, just like every other day you have lived. You just have no idea when it is finally going to come for you, and that scares the crap out of me. I am not saying that I want to know when I am going to die, or when those I love are going to die, but as I get older, it scares me more and more. I think about it more and more. The worst times are late at night when I am the only one awake. It is dark and quiet and my mind just runs with the idea of it. These thoughts usually freak me out, but then the next day arrives and the light makes me feel safe and secure. My days go on as normal.

I wonder if that is how Justin felt? Did he ever think about death? Did he wonder when it was going to come, and then when daybreak hit, did he feel safe again and forget all about it? Did he have any sort of premonition for what was to occur on Monday?

What I do know is that I felt his presence tonight. Tonight during the candlelight vigil, which was one of the most amazing things I have ever witnessed, there was a moment of silence in his honor. During this time, the wind strengthened and cooled. It lasted the entire 30 seconds of silence. Once the talking began again, the wind lightened up and it wasn't as cool. I know that was him. I know that was his way to tell us that he appreciated us all being there for him. You could just feel it. There was no question about it.

The funeral is Friday and I am not going to make it. I just know it is going to be almost impossible to get it off of work with so many teachers being gone already for the funeral or for school activities. It just really sucks because I wish I could be there to witness it. Not only because I admired the guy, but because I, to some extent, desire the emotion that comes with funerals. I sometimes feel dead inside because when I hear about someone dying, it doesn't seem to really phase me. It just doesn't seem real. Maybe it is because the last few deaths in my life haven't been people that I am really close to and see on a regular basis. Maybe it is that it just never really hits me that this is reality. I don't know, but what I do know is that what has hurt me the most in this entire situation is seeing my dad so sad. Justin's death is very sad to me because he was a great guy, but seeing my dad so torn up is what really gets to me. I know that he was like another son to him, and I feel for his pain. I feel for his pain and I feel for everyone else's pain. That's what hurts the most for me. And, I think that's where the emotion finally comes into play for me: at the funeral. Everyone is extremely upset, and you can't help but to cry for their pain.

Sunday, April 10, 2011

I don't really have a title...not feeling creative right now

So, I have decided that I want to start fixing up our house. I mean, we have pretty nice house, so we should make it even better. I just have never been the greatest at decorating, but I am going to try. I want this place to look nice. I want to paint, too. (Hope that is okay.) And I want to get artwork and other things to put up on our walls. I am kind of excited about this, but don't think it will happen before school is out. I am too busy right now to even really get into it all.

This weekend was lovely, except for the test I had due today. Friday, was, err, well you heard about Friday. Saturday, however, was pleasant. I had a little time on my own to work on my test. Collin was napping and Josh went to KC to get his contacts. Then, later on, I went to Hazel's with my mom and sis. That was really nice. I don't get to hang out with them enough. Saturday night we had a family BBQ. That was really fun, too. Anna is growing up so fast and she reached her arms out and leaned to me. So cute!!!!

The test made this day okay. I mean, I stressed out about it and it took up most of my Sunday, but I am hoping the rest of the night goes okay. Fingers crossed.

Friday, April 8, 2011

Why must rain always arrive during a parade?

Why must my day always go awry at some point? I mean, seriously. This has been a stressful week. I was even at the point of questioning whether or not I should be a teacher anymore. I mean, that's serious. That would be a whole life-changing decision to quit teaching and find something else, but I was at that point this week. I really thought that maybe I would be better off if I left it and found another occupation. What? I don't know. I just know I wasn't happy and I felt like I was doing a horrible job.

Today started off okay. It's Friday...the last day of the work week...and I get to wear jeans! What could be better than that? And then a student said the most amazing thing to me. He told me that he thinks his writing is improving because he has been reading more. Bingo! Hit the nail on the head. The constant repetition of why reading is important finally sunk in. Wow! It took how many years to understand that? And still most of my students don't. He, however, made my day. Then everything else went well, too.

Getting home was a breeze and there weren't any real issues. It wasn't until later in the night that things began to turn sour. Collin was a pain and Josh was a grump. I don't know what I did. I was actually having a good day, but, of course, it couldn't last the entire day. Could it? This sucks!

And, even though I now finally have some peace and quiet to work on things, a freaking big spider just came down from our ceiling less than a foot away from me. Really? A freaking, ugly, gross spider and no boy to come and get it for me? I hate them! HATE!!!! Luckily there was a paper towel and I got it, but I still had the willies afterward. Yuck!

Sunday, April 3, 2011

Brainstorming...I guess that is what this is today

I hate when I have to write an essay and I don't know what to say. I know what I want to talk about, but it just isn't going in the direction I want it to go. For my teaching writing class, we have to write an essay or a creative non-fiction piece about...anything! That's what I hate. I want more direction.

Anyway, I am writing about the Orphan Train. I thought I would write about this because I feel it is something important in history (and in my life) and no one really knows about it. Basically, in New York, they established this train that took orphaned and neglected children out to the Midwest to new families. My great-grandfather and many of his siblings (he had a lot of siblings...his parents just didn't stop having kids) were put onto the Orphan Train. They were brought out to the Midwest and he was taken in by a family in Maryville. He was 11 when this happened, so the family that took him permanently took him more as a farmhand than as a son. To me, that is really sad, but I guess that was just how it was. He was taken away from his real parents, where even though they were very poor, he probably felt loved and cared for and like a son. Then he gets sent here. He isn't poor any more, but he is treated more as a worker than a son. His new "parents" weren't as loving as real parents are, and he had to grown up with that for the rest of his life.

Anyway, I want to tell this story in a somewhat creative, somewhat informative way, but I don't want it to be boring. I don't want it to be an autobiography of his life. I want it to be more than that. So, I am banging my head up against a wall trying to come up with an idea. (Okay, really, I am checking in on Facebook all of the time and peering out the window wishing I was outside.) I just don't know what to write. I have it started, but am not happy with it. Hopefully venting about it through writing will help.

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Can this school year be over with? Please?

This has been the most stressful school year not only for me, but for Josh, too. It really sucks. If I am not stressed with my masters classes or one of the classes I teach at school, then Josh is stressed with CTA stuff. I am just tired of it. It feels like we are unhappy more than we are happy. We are cranky, we are short-tempered, we are not happy, and we are TIRED! It is exhausting feeling this way most days. I just really wish this year were over. I wish my classes were done. I wish the yearbook was put together and ready to be completely submitted. I wish it was summer so Josh would get a break as president. This just isn't any fun.

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Emotionally Exhausted

I am just exhausted...emotionally. The past weekend brought about an ended friendship; this week brought about being offended and a student complaining about me on a Facebook. I don't know why I really care about any of this because it really shouldn't matter, but it does bother me and it wears me out. I just wish I could take a trip away somewhere for awhile. I was hoping things would get better once the week started, but they haven't.

I have never been more ready for summer break.

Sunday, February 27, 2011

Stress + Aimee = Bad combination

Stress and me just do not get along. It just causes so many problems, not only for me, but for everyone around me. People always tell me to let things go and to quit worrying, but it is really hard not to.

This school year has been really difficult for me. On top of trying to be a good mother and a good wife, I am teaching pretty much all new classes that I have never taught before, dealing with our yearbook which takes TONS of work (seriously, TONS), do everything I need to do as the student council adviser, and take two masters classes online. If you have never taken an online class, try it just so you understand...they are harder than attending class. Professors feel like they have to make up for class discussion by adding tons more reading and work to do online. Trying to keep all of these things straight and get everything accomplished on time has been really difficult. It has caused so much stress on me, which has caused stress on my husband, which has caused stress on our relationship. I know he feels like I am never happy, but that isn't true. I am happy, most of the time. I just have a lot of things on my plate right now and it is really difficult to keep up with it all. I try to get in some physical activity to relieve some stress, but I don't know what else to do. He tells me to go to another room and have some alone time, but it isn't easy to relax when your son is screaming and crying in the other room, or the dogs are getting into trouble for peeing in the house or chewing up something they are not supposed to have.

I know I am guilty of freaking out sometimes about the smallest things. I know that I need to not care about things as much as I do. I know that I need to relax. I just wish I knew how. I have always been this way (not this bad...not since I was president of my sorority--talk about stress!), and I just don't know what to do right now when it seems to be worse than ever. The biggest thing I need is to not have so much stuff on my plate. I need a break. I need to be able to just relax and not have to worry about ten million things at once.

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

The Devil and Angel of Eating

Okay, so I totally want to get into shape. I am so tired of feeling like I look like a blob. I know one of my biggest issues is eating. This winter has kept me inside and bored, so what have I done to keep myself busy?: EAT! Yeah, you got it. I eat for entertainment. Except last week. I actually got it pretty under control during the snow days. I didn't allow myself to eat when I was bored (even though I was extremely), if I did want a snack I ate something small and healthy, and I kept my meal portions small. I was feeling pretty good. Well, tonight all of that went out the window. I tell you, there is a devil on one shoulder and an angel on the other. The angel tells me, "Slow down. Don't eat too much. You don't want to become a fat cow." I start to listen, but then the little food devil pipes in, "Oh, you can eat one more fajita and be okay. Come on, finish that margarita, you know you've had a bad day." And, for some reason, that little fat devil wins. Ugh! So, now I have to get through the rest of the night feeling like a cow, knowing that I am not going to be active enough tonight to burn any of it off.

Tomorrow, however, is a new day, and hopefully, I will get back to the way I have been. I am really thinking a salad sounds good for lunch.

Monday, January 31, 2011

So ready for spring


I woke up this morning figuring we would have school. I never imagined that school would've been canceled today. I had already taken a shower when I found out. Boo! My hair was wet, and I had already woken up Josh. Then, when I was finally thinking about going back to bed, Collin woke up. We cuddled and watched some cartoons for a little while. Luckily, he was good enough to go back to sleep for a few hours!

The rest of the day has been quite boring. I finished a book, tried reading on another one, but just felt tired from lack of physical activity. So, I began to watch Angels and Demons. It was pretty good, but stupid Internet connection was messing up, and so it wouldn't let me watch the movie anymore through Netflix instant queue. How dumb! So, I moved onto washing dishes. That's never fun, but it needed to be done. However, now my hands are really dry. I hate washing dishes!

Saturday we had a birthday party for my mom. It was a pretty cool theme: black and white with international cuisine. It was really interesting to see the different dishes that were brought, and everything was quite delicious! I wish I had been able to socialize more downstairs with everyone, but three-year-old kids are a handful. I hope it is just the age right now, but sometimes I am at my wit's end with Collin. He can be so defiant. He can be so stubborn, and there are times when he really doesn't care if he gets into trouble or not. I don't know what to do sometimes. Ahhh!!!!

Yesterday we went grocery shopping. We hadn't gone on a major grocery shopping trip since early December, so our cart was completely full, and we spent quite a bit. Guess that's what you get when you wait so long. Collin, however, was REALLY good at Hy-Vee. We ate there and then shopped and he was good the entire time. He definitely made up for the night before.

Now I am just waiting to see if this snow comes. Everyone seems to be freaking out, and I thinking I am one of the only people that believes that we aren't going to get much. Maybe I am crazy, but I can just imagine this huge worry, and then just get a little bit. I guess we will just have to wait and see. However, it is Court Warming week, so it should snow...every Court Warming, it seems, it has snowed. Just wish I knew if I should pick out my outfit for school tomorrow, or make plans to keep myself occupied inside my house!

Monday, January 17, 2011

Snow Days=More Time to Read

Snow days used to be a wonderful thing when I was a student. Okay, they have been great as a teacher as well. However, lately, these snow days have been quite boring. Maybe it is because they happened right after Christmas break, but I have been so extremely bored. I feel like I have been in my home more than anywhere else, and it is usually the opposite. Usually I am missing just sitting at home.

What I can say about the snow days is that they have given me time to read some books, watch some movies, and get some laundry washed. That's been really nice since my classes at MU start up again this week...unfortunately. I am not looking forward to all of the work I am going to have to put in. Blah! I love to read (stuff I am interested in) and, once classes start back up, I won't have the time. Sucks.

The first book I read, okay, well, finished was The New York Regional Mormon Singles Halloween Dance, a memoir by Elna Baker.

The book took me awhile to get into, but after about halfway through, I was hooked. Elna is a Mormon who deals with many common situations all people in their 20s deal with, but she struggles to find a happy medium between the various desires she has and her religion. She is funny and I think she would be fun to hang out with.

The next book I read was True Believer by Nicholas Sparks.

I was in the mood for an easy read and Nicholas Sparks is just that. I love his books, but all of his books follow the same basic plot. This one strayed away a little from his usual plot structure, and I liked that. It was a little surprising that way. It still had all of the romance and the perfect guy in it, which takes you away from reality, which is nice on those crazy, stressful days everyone has every once in awhile.

I've started reading The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo by Stieg Larsson. I am only in the first few pages, but I have heard it is really good. It is just going to take me awhile to get through since life is going to be crazy again soon.